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LYL Season 3, Ep. 4 – My Typical Reactions – How to Control Your Reactions to the Good, Bad, and Ugly to Become a Greater Influencer

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When I was in high school I busted my knuckles after punching a ping pong table.  

It wasn’t really the ping pong table’s fault. It didn’t have it coming. It wasn’t as if the ping pong table had called my mom a dirty name and I needed to defend her honor.

The ping pong table was a unlucky victim of the rage I felt after a broom in the garage fell over and made a loud noise. Yes, this story is starting out as one of the most ridiculous stories of all-time.

And yes, the recap of this story is that I got scared in the garage as a high school kid when a broom fell over and made a very loud noise. In my sense of fear I got angry and punched the ping pong table. I needed to take control of my reaction to create a better outcome.

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This wasn’t the first time I reacted in anger. I got mad and yelled when my sisters mistreated me (maybe they deserved it). I got angry when I didn’t get an A on my paper. I didn’t intend on becoming the angry kid, but my family and friends knew to walk on eggshells around me. 

My unintended reactions eventually defined me.

My mom set me down one day and said that no one wanted to pursue relationships with me because of my anger. My words had started to become my actions, my actions then become my habits, and then I was habitually angry.

It took years for me to correct my wrongs and repair my relationships. I now know that I can’t control how I feel, but I can control how I react to my emotions. 

(If you haven’t taken the Live Your List Assessment, it isn’t too late. Story continued below.)

Twitter assessment

What now? Take the Typical Reactions Worksheet & Take Control

I intentionally focus on my reactions by following the “My Typical Reactions” worksheet (theme music not included). If I spend my time and energy controlling my reactions instead of the actions that are out of my control I will have more time to become the influencer I hope to some day become.

Download the worksheet below and post your thoughts on the Live Your List Facebook group. Continue to be awesome. Repeat.

My Typical Reactions Worksheet

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Nick Collison Pick of the Day

1. The Success Principles by Jack Canfield. In The Success Principles, the cocreator of the phenomenal bestselling Chicken Soup for the Soul series, helps you get from where you are to where you want to be, teaching you how to increase your confidence, tackle daily challenges, live with passion and purpose, and realize all your ambitions. Filled with memorable and inspiring stories of CEO’s, world-class athletes, celebrities, and everyday people, it spells out the 64 timeless principles used by successful men and women throughout history—proven principles and strategies that can be adapted for your own life, whether you want to be the best salesperson in your company, become a leading architect, score top grades in school, lose weight, buy your dream home, make millions, or just get back in the job market.

2. The Speed of Trust by Stephen M. R. Covey. Trust, says Stephen M.R. Covey, is the very basis of the new global economy, and he shows how trust—and the speed at which it is established with clients, employees, and constituents—is the essential ingredient for any high–performance, successful organization.

For business leaders and public figures in any arena, The Speed of Trust offers an unprecedented and eminently practical look at exactly how trust functions in our every transaction and relationship—from the most personal to the broadest, most indirect interaction—and how to establish trust immediately so that you and your organization can forego the time–killing, bureaucratic check–and–balance processes so often deployed in lieu of actual trust.

Fired Up Quotes

“People spend too much time finding other people to blame, too much energy finding excuses for not being what they are capable of being, and not enough energy putting themselves on the line, growing out of the past, and getting on with their lives.” – J. Michael Straczynski 

“A good leader takes a little more than his share of the blame, a little less than his share of the credit.” -Arnold H. Glasow  (Tweet That)

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